George Will Got Laid 4 times in 1979,

And has gotten laid, on average, only 2.3 times since then, according to the University of Illinois Arctic Climate Research Center, which predicts that, with the "La Nina" weather event in the Pacific, George Will will only get laid 1.6 times in 2009, including a rather embarrassing moment with a half eaten container of cottage cheese.

Privatization.

I think we're about due for another George Will column on why the privatization of Social Security is such an excellent opportunity for the American people.